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About
the process
The
process of bringing profound change into our
lives by becoming self-aware begins by seeing
that we, ourselves, really do have negative
thoughts, attitudes and emotions, belief systems
and desires. The next steps - inner child work
and meditation - go hand in hand and are the
means by which we become self-aware. They teach
us how we came to be the person we are today.
Armed with self-awareness, self-respect and
resolution of inner child issues, our lives take
on new meaning. The pain and negativity from the
past seem to magically disappear: Not because
we're ignoring it or medicating it, but because
we have dealt with the past. We become less
inclined to judge, criticize and condemn because
we know that we are all the same - we are all
capable of anything, given the right
circumstances. Self-awareness enables us to
forgive, it frees us from dwelling in the past
and it enables us to truly treat others as we
would like to be treated, without needing them to
respond in kind. This does not mean that we must
allow others to treat us poorly, but it does mean
that we become empowered to say 'no' to
unreasonable demands or abusive treatment without
feeling guilty, angry or resentful - without
going on a drinking binge, or a shopping spree,
or a cleaning frenzy, or whatever our favourite
self-punishment or -medication happens to be.
It's all too easy to just deny that we ever have
negative thoughts, attitudes or emotions, but
it's seldom our intention to have them. They just
seem to happen, almost like a reflex. These
habitual thought patterns easily slip by
unnoticed. Constant repetition of such negative
messages can only harm us, yet we say them to
ourselves (and others!) day in and day out. It's
not that we're "bad" for having
negative thoughts, attitudes and emotions;
rather, it's up to us to recognize and change
them. The thoughts, attitudes and emotions
(positive or negative) are the great equalizer,
for we all have them - no matter who we are, or
where we live, or what we do for a living. Many
people become frustrated when they make repeated
attempts to change their physical appearance or
surroundings so that they'll feel better, and
then find that it didn't work. To truly change
self requires changing the thoughts, attitudes
and emotions.
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